Getting Serious about Getting Married, by Debbie Maken

An excerpt:
For so many women the tragic outcome of indefinite singleness is primarily the product of cultural forces that affect believers and nonbelievers alike-- an open-ended, male-friendly mating structure geared toward low-commitment, shallow, cyclical relationships as opposed to marriage; a protracted education system that doesn't really educate, containing students who embrace perpetual schooling without any commitment or direction to finding a meaningful calling for the purposes of settling into family life; parenting with only minimal expectations of self-sufficiency; under-involvement of fathers in the lives of their children; the defining down of adulthood and the elongation of youthful adolescence; the lack of male leadership; the removal of societal shame for being a perennial bachelor...We no longer have a culture that esteems marriage as a worthy goal, the crowning achievement of one's life. Culturally we think of marriage as optional, and the church agrees, citing God's will as justification for that belief. p. 91


It's quite interesting to read this book at this time, because of the discussion currently on the RUF list-serv. Other Kelly posted a link to an article by Al Mohler, in which he rebukes Christians for thinking as the world does regarding children. The subject is evidently a touchy one, and as we've been talking about it, we've turned towards another touchy subject: marriage and singleness. I had no idea what RUFers thought about singleness (in theory). I do know what I see-- which is exactly what Mrs. Maken describes-- the girls want to get married but are running in the opposite direction (career), and the guys seem to just be sitting around, waiting for life and wife to suddenly drop into their laps. I think the general consensus on the list-serv was, "Who are you (read: anyone) to tell me what to do?" Evidently we aren't allowed to say that God made the world to work a certain way--with families. It's been a frustrating discussion. I tend to just want to say, "Look, here's what the Bible says. Just do it." But, unfortunately, that doesn't usually work.

An Interesting Thought:

Galadriel as the Law?

http://lordofthekingdom.com/2006/07/17/galadriel-and-the-law/

So, What Kind of Eunuch Are You? &tc.

1. I finally bought the book everyone's been talking about: Getting Serious about Getting Married, by Debbie Maken. I'm in the middle of the 'marraige is a duty' chapter. The book is profound, not so much because Mrs. Maken is a good writer (she's not bad) but because of the subject matter. It's just so un-modern, which I appreciate greatly. I do wish, however, that she would quote more Scripture. I understand her arguments, but I don't know how effective the book will be for someone like Lisa, for example, who wants to get married, but sees singleness as equal with marraige.

This book supplied my post title, as the authoress cited the three reasons a person is exempt from marraige: 1. He was born a eunuch, 2. He was made a eunuch, and 3. He has been given the gift of continence 'for the sake of the kingdom of heaven'. (Matt. 19:11-12) Celibacy is for the celibate.

2. I recently found a list of Dystopian literature on Wikipedia. I printed it off and am making my way through, trying to find some good authors and stories. So far, I've looked at maybe a dozen books and found only one author that I enjoy-Philip K. Dick. He wrote Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, and the short stories 'Minority Report' and 'Paycheck', which have all become popular movies. He's very Bradbury-esque.

3. On Sunday night at the graduate student discussion, we heard a man speak on the flat earth myth. It was quite interesting. Apparently, medievals didn't think the earth was flat. Also, there were discussions among the ancients concerning people on other planets and whether or not the sacrifice of Jesus applied to them (if they were fallen). Evidently C.S. Lewis didn't just make all that up. The mind...it boggles.

Why Read Fiction?

I went to SOCAPS last night-- OU's Society of Christian Apologists and Philosophers. I'll be going to this meeting every other Sunday night. On the others, I'll be at RUF's graduate student discussion group. You see, I'm a graduate student now. I'm going for my masters in home economics. ;)

After the meeting last night, we sat around for a while and chatted. The young man who is facilitating discussion argued with me about whether or not fiction has any value or benefit. I said it does, of course, and gave some good reasons, but he didn't understand my arguments and went away saying that fiction was a waste of time. What a shame. I doubt I'll ever be able to convince him, but I'd still like to refine my reasoning on this subject. Of what value is fiction? Here are some of the things I said, in a nutshell:

1. It is enjoyable. (No gnosticism here!)
2. It stretches the mind and makes a person well-rounded.
3. It emphasises relationship, which is the fundamental way the world works.
4. It provides insight into the way other people act and think.
5. It gives fodder for discussion and thought.
6. The Bible is a story. All good stories are the Bible story all over again.

And here are some things I've thought of since then that I should have said:
1. It develops the imagination
2. It shows us how God may work in another person's life.
3. It reveals the truth of myth and legend--stories like St. George and Beowulf, for example. Did they happen, or not? (This last, however, is too big a subject to bring up in passing.)

And that's all I can think of for the moment. That poor boy, he just didn't pay attention to anything I said. I think he only wanted to infuriate me, and didn't care what I thought. Not a very good leader for a philosophy discussion group...